WHOEVER BUYS THIS FOR ME WINS MY ETERNAL LOVE
I OWN THIS
EVERY MORNING HE SAYS SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT HOW THE WORLD NEEDS YOU AND YOU HAVE TO GET UP
AND WHEN YOU PRESS THE BUTTON TO HUSH HIM HE SAYS “DEFTLY DONE, MADAM,” OR “IF IT’S NOT TOO FORWARD OF ME, THAT DID TICKLE, MADAM”
IT WAKES YOU UP WITH THE SOUND OF CHIRPING BIRDS BEFORE STEPHEN FRY’S VOICE
EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE ONE
(Source: thinkgeek.com, via you-must-be-truly-desperate)
so we had 3 bottles of shampoo and 0 bottles of conditioner
then mum came home excited that she bought ten bottles of conditioner on sale
it turns out she bought shampoo
now we have 13 bottles of shampoo
and 0 bottles of conditioner
here’s another fun little tidbit
the shampoo she bought is for premium blonde to sand dune coloured hair
i am your child have you ever sEEN ME WE ARE ASIAN GODDAMNIT
(Source: renloras, via moffataddict)
Play the audio and let your life near completion.
I’m dying
(via thehobbitlord)
why are girls like “oh it’s december i need a boyfriend to keep me warm” no you can buy a coat like the rest of the single people
(via sherlokithemoose)
I love everything in this
(Source: iraffiruse, via thehobbitlord)
so we were talking about sexism in maths and i sit on a table with all boys, and i said “you know women could all agree to stop having sex with men and essentially stop the human race” and this one boy goes “well boys could all agree to stop having sex with women and-” but this other boy cut him off like “yeah dude that ain’t gonna happen” and i died
(via sherlokithemoose)
(Source: jello-time, via sherlokithemoose)
Dear future wife,
This is happening.Dear future husband,
This is happening.
These people are epic.
I love this.
btw I ship you
(via sherlokithemoose)
To me, songs are kind of like bookmarks. Have you ever listened to a song that you haven’t heard in a while, and all of a sudden, all the memories of that time period come back, and you remember what your life used to be like. They’re like milestones in your life.
(Source: skate-high, via gotfandomsuperwholock)
Look at these amazing doll repaints by Noel Cruz, look at them!
Holy fuck.
(via whereischarlesleee)
the-doctors-consulting-detective:
seriously you guys this is getting ridiculous
But where did it come from?
Where did it go
Where did you come from cotton eyed joe
(via sherlokithemoose)
if you go to condomusa.com you can get free condoms
this has been a psa don’t be silly wrap your willy
Signal boosting the hell out of this.
REBLOGGING BECAUSE
BE SAFE EVERYONE
does this mean its possible to send a bunch of condoms to someone’s house for no charge?
I believe that is EXACTLY what this means.
(via thehobbitlord)
THIS IS THE ONLY WOMAN WHO CAN STAND NEXT TO BEYONCE AND STILL BE THE MOST FABULOUS PERSON IN THE ROOM
(Source: lizlemonism, via gotfandomsuperwholock)
I dont want sex, i want the things that lead up to it. The slow kissing then the passionate kissing, then the pulling closer, the neck kisses, the grabbing, biting, heavy breathing, grinding, the pauses while you catch your breath, feeling each other. Oh my.
Sex is nice too.
I was honestly expecting this to turn into a demonic sacrifice and now I’m disappointed
(via gotfandomsuperwholock)
why is this whole website suddenly obsessed w/ cotton eyed joe
Yeah like where did it come from where did it go
(via j0hnl0ck3d)
